When You Crash With Long COVID: Making Room to Recover
Sometimes the plan has to change
Normally, I try to have my post scheduled to go live Tuesday morning at 10 a.m. Eastern. And here it is Wednesday, and I’m just now starting to write.
Last week, we moved our daughter halfway across the country, and I do NOT travel well anymore. Two days in a car each way is a bit much for me, even when I’m not doing the driving. So here I am trying to get rid of a cold and dealing with a crash.
I’ve been talking a lot about pacing and planning in my community as well as here on the blog. Something I’ve said a few times is that pacing means being ready to adjust your plans when your capacity just isn’t there.
Just because I have a list of things to do, both personally and professionally, it doesn’t mean I’m able to get them done right now.
So, I’m practicing what I teach.
I’m using my backup plan for my daily routine, and I’m resting as much as possible. I’ve checked off my top three priorities for today and cleared my calendar. I’ll write this article in stages since my brain needs rest too. It may not get posted until tomorrow, and that’s just fine with me.
One thing to keep in mind: I’m talking here about managing a crash that follows a familiar pattern for me. If your symptoms are new, noticeably different from your usual crashes, or getting worse, contact your healthcare provider rather than assuming it’s another crash. Severe or sudden symptoms may need urgent medical attention.
Start with the capacity you have today
So, what am I actually doing?
I have a general backup plan as well as an emergency backup plan. Having both plans already sketched out reduces the mental energy needed to figure out what to do first.
The first question is: which plan do I use? Do I have drastically reduced energy, or do I have zero energy? Drastically reduced energy means I can go with the backup plan. Zero energy means it’s time for the emergency backup plan, where the bare minimum gets done.
Today, that was an easy question for me to answer. Not only was I able to remember that I didn’t get a post prepared, but that thought didn’t incite panic. For me, that was a clue about today’s capacity. I’m able to think clearly about what needs to get done, and the thought doesn’t overwhelm me.
So I don’t need the emergency backup plan. I can get some things done, just not a lot, and I’ll need to rest more throughout the day.
How you decide between a backup plan and an emergency backup plan will be unique to you. For me, it’s mostly about mental capacity. Am I able to think about the things I need to do without feeling overwhelmed, or is even that too much?
For physical capacity, am I able to move around slowly without feeling like I need a cane or a wheelchair, or is even getting to the bathroom and back a challenge?
Use the low-energy version of your routine
My backup plan is pretty simple. I stay hydrated, make sure I get enough protein, and rest frequently. Household chores are not done by me. Anything that must get done is handed off to my husband or my son. I canceled the appointments I had today and let the choir director know I wouldn’t be there for rehearsal. So my schedule is cleared for recovery.
I made soup this past weekend as well as a breakfast scramble, so that covers me for meals. If I get sick of those, I’ll have the family make something or go pick something up for me. DoorDash might get called. I have a handful of restaurants that work well for me and fit with my dietary needs and preferences.
So that takes care of my personal life.
For work, the top focus is on my Skool community. These are the people I’m actively helping learn how to live with Long COVID and vaccine injury, so that’s my first priority. I check in, make sure all is well, and see whether anybody needs anything from me.
Right now, I have a series of posts that are already prepared, so it’s just a matter of copying and pasting. If I didn’t have one ready, I’d either skip it or do a quick check-in post letting people know I’m available but a response might be delayed since it’s an off day for me.
And now I’m working on this article. Like I said earlier, it will happen in stages. I write for a bit, then go rest and come back to it later.
I’m using my modified Pomodoro technique to remind me to stop working and go rest every 30 minutes. That’s a reminder to stop, not a requirement to keep working for the full 30 minutes if I need a break sooner.
Make room for true rest
And by rest, I mean true rest. I either lie down in bed or zone out on the couch. I’m not scrolling social media or watching anything that might overstimulate me. I might work on a familiar knitting project. I’ll probably listen to some soothing music, my favorite brown noise, or the sound of rain. Those are things that soothe my brain and help me rest.
Rest is different for everyone. What soothes my mind might feel distracting or irritating to you. You might prefer silence, or knitting might take more concentration than you have available. Pay attention to how you respond and choose what helps you feel more settled. Your rest doesn’t need to look like mine.
Don’t turn the first better day into catch-up day
So that’s how I work on recovery. But what about when I start to feel better?
I do NOT jump right back in and start catching up on everything that got delayed while I recovered. It’s tempting to do that, and once upon a time, it’s exactly what I did. But that led to a crash-recover-crash cycle, and my crashes kept getting worse.
I start by doing a brain dump to get everything out of my head and onto paper. Then I go through and sort it:
What do I have to do?
What can someone else do?
What can wait?
What doesn’t actually need to get done?
Next, I look at priorities. What needs to get done first, second, third and so on?
If we’re almost out of clean clothes, laundry is a bit higher on the list. If we’re almost out of prepared foods or freezer meals, a meal plan and shopping get bumped up (grocery pickup and delivery are a must for me on days like these).
I’m fortunate that my husband and son can both help with the cooking, and we’ve worked out a system for those kinds of days. I sit at the dining room table or on the couch in the nearby living room and direct the cooking while seated. That way, I’m there to prompt them about where things are or what needs to get done, while they handle the physical work.
For my work, I prioritize things a little differently. It all comes down to the most important things for my current clients and community members, then the blog and other outreach.
To keep from overdoing it, I keep using my timer. Where before I’d set it for 30 minutes and go rest, now I’ll go back to my modified Pomodoro rhythm: 25 minutes of work followed by five minutes of rest.
If my capacity allows, I’ll do two cycles and then take a longer break. That’s the rhythm I use, but I stop sooner or skip another cycle when I need to.
All the time, I’m keeping an eye on my energy levels. If I start to feel a little more fatigued than I like or if thinking gets harder, I go back to crash recovery.
Basically, it’s one big balancing act. As my capacity allows, I take on a little more, adjusting again when I need to. And I keep writing down the stuff I haven’t gotten to so it doesn’t get forgotten.
You’re still figuring things out, and that’s okay
The hardest part for me when I first started learning how to manage my symptoms was to forgive myself for crashes.
It isn’t my fault that my energy fluctuates. It isn’t my fault that I can’t always do everything I’d like to do. Having a crash doesn’t mean I’ve failed. Sure, sometimes I crash because I overdid it. But you know what? That’s called life. Nobody is perfect. And sometimes life throws a curveball.
And sometimes, something matters enough to me that I choose to do it even knowing there may be an energy cost. Like helping move my daughter halfway across the country because I love her and will miss her as she embarks on her new life.
That cost can be substantial, and someone else may need to make a different choice. The point is not to have the perfect pacing plan that prevents every crash. The point is to make informed choices about how you use your energy so that you can participate in your life. And sometimes this might mean you have a crash.
When I feel frustrated about the things that aren’t getting done, I tell myself, frequently, that it’s okay. Most of the things I’ve postponed don’t need to happen right away, even if I wish they were already done.
The thing I want you to take away from this is that it’s okay that you aren’t perfect. It’s okay that you’re still figuring things out. It’s okay to step back and prioritize your health and recovery.
Of course, forgiving yourself for the crash is crucial, but what about going forward?
As you start to recover, and when you have enough capacity, you can start making notes on what was happening before the crash. Look for patterns and do some detective work. What can you learn from the experience?
Is there something you might have done differently in the moment? If you knew you were going to need to push yourself, is there something you could have handled differently before the activity?
Do you need to take some time to make those backup plans? Could you put together a few more meals or meal kits to make meals easier? What about a simple meal plan to fall back on?
You don’t have to figure all of that out today. For now, start with one question:
What is one thing you can simplify, postpone, or ask for help with today while you’re recovering from a crash?
References
NHS England: Commissioning guidance for post-COVID services for adults, children and young people
Norfolk Post-COVID Assessment Service
